3-1-1 on Asking Questions


The first essential aspect of a powerful question is being fully present. Take the time to be attentive and genuinely curious, not only to the words someone speaks but also to the subtleties of their body language and expressions. 

There's no time like the present. 

There's no present like time. 

There's no greater way to demonstrate our love than to be fully present.


Avoid using leading questions as they inherently contain a preconceived right answer. Such questions lack genuine curiosity and compel individuals to provide the response they believe the questioner expects. In essence, the questioner disguises their opinion within the question itself.


Utilize "What" questions instead of "Why" questions to foster open and curious discussions. "Why" questions often seek justification and can make individuals feel defensive. On the other hand, "What" questions are forward-looking, encourage exploration, and create a space for open-ended responses.

1 Tip

After you ask a question, wait for the person to speak, regardless of how difficult or uncomfortable it may be. Even if their initial response is "I don't know," it is crucial to give them space and time to think. This is especially true when you have asked a thought-provoking question.

1 Reflection Question

What might asking great questions look like for you if it were easy? 


-J.P. Nerbun

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