3-1-1: Wanting to win, emotions in leadership, and a simple tip to start building trust with your team

3 Thoughts


We should all want to win. Wanting to win increases and focuses our energy. But when we crave winning, our wanting has grown into an attachment and becomes the source of unmanageable stress and discontentment in our lives. And no amount of winning will fill the bottomless pit of craving.


Great leaders are not emotionless.

They manage their reactions to their emotions.

They respond in a way that is most beneficial for the team.


One of the great challenges in coaching is allowing the space between where we are as a team and where we want to be to motivate us and our players without making us miserable and discontent. The key is to accept our current circumstances, while being consistent and intentional about our growth. 

1 Simple Tip

Three Steps to Build Trust

  1. Be open to feedback
  2. Recognize mistakes and apologize
  3. Make changes in behaviors consistent

1 Reflection

Think of one of the biggest challenges you are facing.

Imagine that challenge contains the perfect gift that you need now in order to grow. What is that gift?

What are you grateful for?

Who do you need to become in order to rise to the challenge?

Source: Coaching for Performance

-J.P. Nerbun

Author of The Culture System

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